My parents once had a party in honor of Van Gogh and they baked a cake in the shape of an ear and decorated it with pink and red frosting. I just hope they don't have a party in honor of John Wayne Bobbit someday. Of course now that I said it they probably will....
So anyway, I sent my dad a book of select Ginsberg interviews, with a note saying, "Happy Howling...Hope this book doesn't 'give rise' to any latent tendencies'", since Ginsberg is probably one of the gayest dead poets alive....well you know what I mean.
Somebody told me once that my dad was staggering around at one of the local "it's-not-just-for-gay-people" gay bars and was allegedly claiming that "Everyone is bi-sexual." Sheesh dad, two Bud Lights and a couple of queer guys sittin' at the bar and you're suddenly "bi-sexual?" No wonder mom can't take you anywhere!
In other news, I went to the local Natural Foods Co-op because I ran out of vitamin B-12 complex, which I take on a regular basis in an attempt to combat my persistent propensity for mental misery. But they were out of vitamin B-12 complex, so I drove across town to the other natural foods store and the only thing I could find was this weird little bottle that said, "Sublingual-Cherry Flavor 2500 mcg Vitamin B-12."
When I got home I took one, then read the label. It said each tablet contains 41,677% of the daily recommended value. I then proceeded to have one of the worst stomach-cramp-diarrhea-attacks of my life.
But today I feel great. Even with more pictures surfacing of Iraqi detainees being tortured and humiliated by American soldiers I'm just as chipper as can be!