Log in

No account? Create an account

Previous Entry | Next Entry

Butt-Nugget and The Family Curse

Be verry quiet, I'm hunting wabbits
This is the butt-nugget with whom I am competing for my sister's attention. Please note the Michelin man tire legs which I hope he retains FOR THE REST OF HIS LIFE! Oh, he may look innocent, but he's guilty as sin! Guilty of tearing me and my sister apart! Guilty of depriving the world of the much needed comic relief that was formerly supplied by his mother via phone calls to me and updates in her livejournal. And he's also guilty of stealing my rightful spot as the center of the universe.

Okay, enough of that Shiite Muslim...on to other news.

What I really want to say is ***HAPPY BIRTHDAY*** to my mother, who was born on Friday, the 13th of August in like 1943 or thereabouts. Everyday when she goes to work, the first thing she does is check my livejournal to see if I've written anything. Then, and only then, does she check my sister's husband's website to see if he's posted any new pictures of the butt-nugget. So at least one person in this family has their priorities straight!--first ME, then Bobby. It's only fair since I was here first! So get in line, BAH-BEE!

Now, I don't want to gloss over the fact that my mom was born on Friday the 13th. In fact, I'd like to discuss an interesting pattern that appears to be developing in my family's history, a little pattern that from henceforth I shall refer to as "The Family Curse."

I'm not sure how far this goes back but to my knowledge, crazy, wacked-out things have happened on certain family member's birthdays.

For example, my mom was born on Friday the 13th and everybody knows that psycho serial killers like to wear hockey masks and murder teenagers on this day.

Then, there's my other sister, Cathy, who was born on July 20, 1964. Not a big deal. Not a big deal that is until her 5th birthday came along and we landed on the moon! Nobody cared that day that it was her birthday, as everyone was glued to their respective televisions, watching the news unfold.

Then, my sister Cathy had her first baby, on SEPT. 11, 1991, and nobody gave a rat's ass about his 10th birthday, I can tell you that much right now.

So, are you seeing the pattern here? I predict that on butt-nugget's 15th birthday some serious shit is going to go down. Possibly the discovery of life on other planets. Possibly another 9/11. We'll just have to wait and see. But remember this day folks, Nov. 5, 2018.....



( 19 comments — Leave a comment )
Aug. 12th, 2004 09:45 pm (UTC)
I'm sure it's all kinds of bad karma to say mean things like that about a iddle widdle baby.

He looks like he'll be starring as Bo Duke

in a remake of

some day. Maybe he'll get the job on his birthday.
Aug. 12th, 2004 10:16 pm (UTC)
lol! That's a good one. My sister will love it!
Aug. 16th, 2004 12:30 pm (UTC)
Bo was totally my hot crush from the 80's!!!!

Wait a minute, Bobby can't play the role of a man I lust after!

.....Suddenly lusting over John Schneider makes me feel very icky.

Aug. 16th, 2004 03:22 pm (UTC)
Re: Eep!
Suddenly lusting over John Schneider makes me feel very icky.

As it should!

He's the male equivalent of....Lynda Carter (aka Wonder Woman).
Aug. 17th, 2004 02:07 pm (UTC)
Re: Eep!
Lynda Carter was totally hot, too. And I say that without any lesbian tendancies. She still is pretty to this day. I think she made the best Wonder Woman out there.

But don't get me started on Wonder Woman unless you wish to open up a Pandora's Box of DC comics Vs. Marvel plus a whole lot of geeky shit that my sister would be sure to roll her eyes at.
Aug. 17th, 2004 03:50 pm (UTC)
Re: Eep!

I see you play M:tG. Or you list it in your interests.

I used to play that game a bunch.
Aug. 17th, 2004 07:42 pm (UTC)
Re: Eep!
Yep, I still play from time to time. I haven't bought any new cards in about three or four months, though. I haven't played with anyone else but friends and I haven't used any of the artifacts or the counters (too complicated). I need to pull out my cards and build a new Blue deck so I can kick my husband's ass. Hee!
Aug. 12th, 2004 10:41 pm (UTC)
Making fun of babies is hilarious. Keep it up.

My mom checks my livejournal religiously. She lives in the other hemisphere, so there's nothing I can do to stop her. Yeesh. I only wish I had some michelin baby to distract her.
Aug. 13th, 2004 06:05 am (UTC)
What about your own birthday? Any drama?
Aug. 13th, 2004 06:08 am (UTC)
Nope. Luckily the family curse has skipped me.
Aug. 13th, 2004 06:15 am (UTC)
You should make something up...or just over-dramatize something small. "On my 18th birthday, Oprah was a re-run!!"
Aug. 13th, 2004 07:55 am (UTC)
hmmmm, okay, let me think about that...
Aug. 13th, 2004 08:26 am (UTC)
I'll bet it IS bad KARMA to say mean things about her baby :)

Did you know that Mary Kate & Ashley Olsen were born on Friday the 13th? And that they are not actually identical? Not that I'm like a fan (NO FULL HOUSE JOKES OK!) but having twins they are refered to a lot...
So, they seem to have had good luck, well, except for that whole anorexia issue...

So, I don't know about your sister, but I find it much easier to use my journal than the phone. I can hold a kid if need be, but mostly they just hang out on the floor next to me or sleep. So tell her that if I can do it, SHE can do it!

"Why is mommy staring into that glowing box AGAIN?!"
Aug. 13th, 2004 10:01 am (UTC)
Funny. Butt nuggett...heh.
Aug. 13th, 2004 08:31 pm (UTC)
How can you harbor ill-will in the face of all that cuteness?!?! In my battles against vampires, when the cross fails I will hold up a picture of Bobby and they will burst into flames. I betcha his drool would sizzle them like holy water if I flung it at them.

I totally know how you feel. All those years I didn't have any kids and one by one my friends started popping them out. They'd stop calling...wouldn't get stoned with me...would get mad if I held their babies upside down to see what would happen. That's why having one of your own is fun!

Sorry, I gotta go now. Bobby just stuffed the cat in the mocrowave and turned it on. Isn't that cute!!!!
Aug. 13th, 2004 08:56 pm (UTC)
Re: Awwww!
Thank God you're still alive. I was starting to worry.
Aug. 13th, 2004 09:12 pm (UTC)
Re: Awwww!
Hey! She IS funny!! :)

>>wouldn't get stoned with me...would get mad if I held their babies upside down to see what would happen. That's why having one of your own is fun!<<

Totally! I still get stoned with my friends, and I don't get mad if they hang my kids upside down :)
Aug. 15th, 2004 04:51 am (UTC)
You all better stop this before it gets out of hand and someone gets hurt.
Aug. 15th, 2004 09:03 am (UTC)
Are you thinking Karma might get hurt or a cat?
( 19 comments — Leave a comment )