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Not Cool

The Boyfriend found this spider in our bathroom. It's a Bold Jumping Spider.

As you can tell by the scale, the spider is approximately 600 meters long. (Ha! Actually, that's part of a topographical map in the background.)

bold jumping spider

According to a field guide we have, Bold Jumping Spiders have elaborate courtship rituals that you can stimulate by holding a mirror in front of one. F*@king narcissists! Too bad we didn't know this before the Mister shook him out in the yard. That would have been interesting to see.

If I had found that spider I'd be in a padded room right now.


( 22 comments — Leave a comment )
Jun. 8th, 2008 06:14 am (UTC)
You don't know fear until you've had a Wolf Spider in your house. Everyone was freaking out and no one wanted to go near that monstrosity. We were terrified to go in the basement. Unfortunately, I was already in the basement. With it.
Jun. 8th, 2008 06:22 am (UTC)
I'm pretty sure I'll have to have a lobotomy if I ever encounter one of those.
Jun. 11th, 2008 01:56 am (UTC)
I saw more than one of those in my old house, but they were always fairly brief glimpses. Every time I locked an eye on it, it darted away. For whatever reason, it really never freaked me out. My girlfriend is more the type to think any spider of any size is "fucking huge", because she has a weird thing about crawly things (big baby.)
Jun. 11th, 2008 03:36 am (UTC)
I have a phobia of all insects, bugs, arachnids, etc. (though funny enough, there is a ranking when it comes to it all. I have a friend who has a complete phobia of scorpions, and they don't bug me as much as other things), so really, anything to me is terrifying, or causes me anxiety. Damn you childhood trauma!
Jun. 11th, 2008 03:47 am (UTC)
Jun. 8th, 2008 06:14 am (UTC)
"Aside from occasional bites, this species does little more than frighten an occasional arachniphobe."

That spider had awesome big blue/green eyes.

Btw, no spiders were harmed in the making of this post. After photographing the wee beastie, I released him in the woodpile behind the shed in our backyard where he can catch all manner of insectoid vermin and frighten more arachniphobes.
Jun. 8th, 2008 07:07 am (UTC)
I found a black widow spider in my workplace this past week. Spiders usually don't scare me but I was pretty freaked out by this one. I should have killed it, but instead I trapped it in a cup and released it outside.

Jun. 8th, 2008 07:12 am (UTC)
That is the coolest spider I have seen lately. The fact that it is Bold and Jumping only adds to that. All the spiders in my house are Thin Crawling spiders and if you hold a mirror in front of them they spend half a day looking for themselves and when they do see themselves they think they're a pin stuck in someone else's web.
Jun. 8th, 2008 07:23 am (UTC)

This spider is also called the "Daring Jumping Spider." Two verbs in one name, it's just unfathomable.
Jun. 8th, 2008 07:23 am (UTC)
That is amazing.
Jun. 8th, 2008 07:50 am (UTC)
The Mister? How strangely formal...I thought his pet name would be something like "bitch ass."
Jun. 8th, 2008 02:36 pm (UTC)
I decided I'm getting to old to have a "boyfriend" and "life partner" sounds gay.
Jun. 8th, 2008 03:04 pm (UTC)
what about "manfriend?" that ought to be good for a laugh or 2....

or you could just go with "This his my LUVER..."
Jun. 8th, 2008 05:40 pm (UTC)
Yeah, yeah!! I vote for manfriend, too. :)
Jun. 8th, 2008 06:10 pm (UTC)
You could always get married.
Jun. 8th, 2008 06:21 pm (UTC)
That's hilarious!
Jun. 11th, 2008 01:54 am (UTC)
This comment reminds me of me, and Grover's expression combined with this comment reminds me even more of me!
Jun. 11th, 2008 03:21 am (UTC)
I like Grover because he's nervous and always freaking out, like me.
Jun. 8th, 2008 05:42 pm (UTC)
I think those are the spiders that George plays with. If you like poke at them they get up on their back legs and wave their front arm pincer things in a "don't fuck with me" way. It's pretty col. She said they have a white marking on them that looks like a smiley face.

I think it's funny that she hates spiders, yet she'll play with those ones.
Jun. 8th, 2008 06:09 pm (UTC)
My husband is fucking terrified of spiders. He saw one of the ceiling, and I dismissed it as him being a pussy until he got dressed and decided he'd sleep in the car. I got it outside and then had to retrieve him from the car. If he'd seen that spider, I'd have had to revive him from a dead faint. He has a true phobia.
Jun. 9th, 2008 04:10 am (UTC)
A 600-meter spider--ha ha ha--that was the funniest thing I read all day! :-)
Jun. 21st, 2008 05:31 am (UTC)
WAY cool! :)
Shots of one in action!! http://nathistoc.bio.uci.edu/spiders/Paudax.htm

So cute and fuzzy...and how can ya hate a spider with a happy face tattooed on it's ass! ;)

( 22 comments — Leave a comment )