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4 glasses of Pinot Grigio (aka "Greasy Penis")
2 Otter Pops
1 Captain Morgan with Coke
______________________________

Dear Stephen Colbert:

Thank you for having Ira Glass on your show. I would have enjoyed your show much more if you had leaned across that table, slowly removed his glasses and tongue-kissed him ever so sweetly. Please do this next time he's on your show. I will name my vagina after you if you do.

God bless.

your # 95,728,531,403,832 fan
Dorothea

Comments

( 18 comments — Leave a comment )
superhappytime
Apr. 25th, 2009 05:49 am (UTC)
An otter pop sounds like something the boyfriend made up to get you hammered so you would pass out and he could take advantage of the situation by ignoring you totally and getting on WoW while listening to DLR.
ygolonac
Apr. 25th, 2009 07:20 am (UTC)
I wasn't even there. She went out 'with the girls'. I was comfortably ensconced at home, slaying virtual evil until she interrupted me by stumbling up the steps to our house, singing "Shiny Happy People" while mooning the neighbors, petting our cat, which was actually not our cat but some stray that she managed to grab in our driveway.
superhappytime
Apr. 25th, 2009 02:41 pm (UTC)
that is classy.
createdestiny
Apr. 25th, 2009 05:32 pm (UTC)
It's also not true.
superhappytime
Apr. 25th, 2009 05:35 pm (UTC)
well, I didn't assume you mooned anyone. The rest sounds true though.
createdestiny
Apr. 25th, 2009 09:11 am (UTC)
It's real, bitch!

Ingredients for a Otter Pop

* White Rum
* Blue Curacao
* Sweet And Sour
* 7-Up
createdestiny
Apr. 25th, 2009 09:12 am (UTC)
Contrary to your "theories" the cat loves me when I'm drunk.
superhappytime
Apr. 25th, 2009 02:42 pm (UTC)
why is it called an otter pop? it sounds like something that happens when you freeze an otter onto a stick.
createdestiny
Apr. 25th, 2009 06:12 pm (UTC)
From Wikipedia: Otter Pops are a brand of frozen snacks sold in the United States. The product consists of a plastic tube filled with flavored sugary liquid; after being frozen the top is cut off. The frozen juice is eaten out of the top of the tube, like a popsicle without a stick.

So it tastes like one of those. Mine was grape and sickeningly sweet. I will not be drinking Otter Pops ever again.
substitute
Apr. 25th, 2009 06:27 am (UTC)
Wow, you mixed sweet white wine and the Captain?
That's scary!

Otter pops, however, are God's Perfect Food.
createdestiny
Apr. 25th, 2009 10:37 am (UTC)
Re: Wow, you mixed sweet white wine and the Captain?
Not the perfect drink, however.
1gr8poetess
Apr. 26th, 2009 06:10 pm (UTC)
God damn it, girl, that was hilarious.
lcurtis
Apr. 29th, 2009 05:57 pm (UTC)
Not my Liver
Oh my! You take after your mother.
createdestiny
Apr. 30th, 2009 12:59 am (UTC)
Re: Not my Liver
In what way? You mean her vagina is named "Stephen Colbert?"
bug_311
May. 1st, 2009 05:48 am (UTC)
I'm sad that you went out and got drunk without me! I'm a professional get-drunk person. :(
createdestiny
May. 2nd, 2009 02:43 am (UTC)
Oh Please! I read on fb about you going out drinking with out me ALL THE TIME!
bug_311
May. 6th, 2009 04:50 am (UTC)
Great! Now everyone thinks I'm lush.

Oh who am I kidding? hahah :)

No seriously, one of these summer nights... YOU. ME. KRIS. PANAMAS. We will party like it's 1999.
createdestiny
May. 7th, 2009 01:21 am (UTC)
Count me in!
( 18 comments — Leave a comment )